Absence from Blogging

As most people know, I've had a lot of changes in my life in the past year. I moved 1500 miles to take a new job in Mississippi. I love my job. As any scientist knows, when you take a new position, there is a lot of setting up new projects and grant/proposal writing. In my first 4 months, I spent so much time staring at a computer that I just can't come home and do it, hence the limited blogging. My husband and I also purchased our first home in July (which is a long story). As any homeowner knows, it takes some time (and lots and lots of trips to Home Depot) to get a new home the way you want it. While we're not done by any means (does it ever really end?), we've now limited ourselves to one project a month. So there is life after grad school. Not surprisingly, it's just as busy as life IN grad school. However, the paycheck is a lot better. :) I'll try to post more regularly from this point on.

"Every time I think about it, all I feel is angry!"

"Every time I think about it, all I feel is angry!" These words were spoken by a friend who is in the same shitty grad student situation I was in just a little over 2 years ago. Like me, she wrote her doctoral dissertation and has been put off by an advisor who doesn't give a damn. Unlike me, she doesn't get weekly emails with lame-ass excuses from her advisor, she actually had absolutely no contact with her advisor for 2 years. Her advisor even took a sabbatical to work with the Obama administration without even notifying her! Her university, unlike mine, DID step in -after 3 years when she refused to pay any more tuition without any progress on her degree! Although all her university has accomplished is re-establishing email contact between her and her advisor. She was supposed to have a defense date by now...she still hasn't received permission to distribute her thesis. Boy, do I know how that feels. I don't blame her at all for being angry. 2 years later and I can honestly say that whenever I think about how I was treated, I still get angry. Not just the "it really pissed me off" abstract angry but "I see red and I'm bound and determined to do whatever I can to 1. make sure it doesn't happen to anyone else and 2. make sure that no one I know even THINKS that attending that university is a good idea!

Revenge is a bitch and I'm really good at being a bitch. Yes, it would probably be healthier to forgive and forget. However, NOTHING would change. That is just NOT acceptable to me. If just thinking about the situation makes me angry 2 years later, then it is not some minor annoyance. I lost 3 years to Professor Sunshine's decision to not give a damn about my dissertation. That is 3 years of having to depend on others to support me. That is 3 years of canceling plans with friends because I just didn't have the money to go out. That is 3 years of depression and self-doubt for which there was no actual reason. I can't let it go. However, the ONLY things I can do is steer people away from that university and do whatever I can to get graduate education reformed in the US. Clearly, with the same thing happening to different students in different programs at different universities is an indication that something isn't right with our system and something needs to change. I think the best change would be for your advisor to NOT have a seat on your committee and NOT have a say in when you graduate, similar to the British system. Yes, the British system can be a bit harsh at times, but if you aren't going to get a degree, they flat out tell you. I haven't heard of anyone being strung along like I was in that system.

AT&T Internet Service Saga

The second full day I was in MS, I discovered that I live on the wrong side of the street to get the MLB package AND NHL center ice (some services I could get one, but not both). So I decided to keep the TV packed up (it is an old 13 inch TV, so no big loss) and went to obtain internet service. First, there is no Fios and no broadband (well, no broadband without a multiple-year contract- something I don't want as I plan to move within 6 months) available here. So that means my choices are dial-up (haven't had to use dial-up since 1996!) or DSL. Of the DSL service providers, AT&T had the best service rating and actually the best prices. So I set out to acquire AT&T internet services.

Day 1- Struggled to locate AT&T store. Based on their address, they are at the local mall (if you can call a building with 5 military recruitment centers, a Radio Shack, a magic store and a movie theater a mall). However, they are not actually even located within the mall parking lot. They have a separate driveway next to the mall. You can't even get to said driveway from the mall parking lot! Finally find the store only to be told that without proof of residence, I can't set up internet service. Arrgh!

Day 3 - On the advice of an AT&T service rep at the store, I order internet service online (no proof of residence check!). No email confirming my order, which seems a bit odd.

Day 4- Call AT&T because still no email confirming my order. Am told that I need to call again the next day because it can take up to 24 hours for an order to be processed and the confirmation email to be sent.

Day 5 - Call AT&T again. Get Angela, the bitchy customer service rep. Angela tells me that my order was canceled because the telephone number I provided, my cell phone number, did not match the service area in which I wanted internet service. What an absolute crock. You can't tell me that in this day and age, this isn't something that AT&T doesn't deal with ALL THE TIME. I figure out pretty quickly that Angela just wants me to purchase more services. She gets very annoyed when I say slowly that I only want internet service. She then tries to sell me a landline. I ask her what good a landline would do when everyone would call my cell phone anyways. "Then you'd have a local number to establish internet service with" is her reply. She didn't like my reply of "that is the dumbest reason I have ever heard. Are you going to take my order for internet service or am I going to hang up, call back and give my order to a customer service rep that is going to listen to what I want?" Angela was very annoyed, but started processing my order- right up until the point where she told me how much it would cost- 3x what it would if I ordered service over the internet. I then told her that I wasn't interested in internet service at that price and asked her to match the internet offer. When Angela then informed me that she couldn't match the offer, I thanked her for her effort, told her I wasn't interested and hung up. I then spoke with my boss about using my office phone number as the reference number, got his OK, and placed yet another internet order.

Day 6 - Still no confirmation email.

Day 7 - Still no confirmation email, so I call AT&T and am informed that no such order exists. At this point, I have a signed copy of my lease, so I decide to go back to the AT&T store. I reach the AT&T store at 4:55pm and am turned away because they close at 5pm. What is with all these stores being open only from 9-5 on weekdays?

Day 10 - Go to AT&T store on my lunch break. They can't activate internet service because there is already service at my location. I'm going to have to get the previous tennant's service turned off before I can establish service. They call my landlady who does precisely nothing. Then Tamara, a supervisor at the AT&T store, pulls up the account information- and discovers that my INITIAL order, that Angela told me was canceled, has actually been processed! Tamara is then incredibly awesome as she worked to verify that my second order was never processed because there was already an active account. Tamara then gives me the UPS tracking number for my router. I call UPS, and discover that because AT&T didn't put my apartment number on the router box , they couldn't deliver it! I ask to have the package held and race to the UPS shipping center to pick it up. Follow the directions and set up internet access. FINALLY

Day 11 - My laptop has been on its last legs for 6 months- it finally dies. Massive hard drive failure, it would cost $800 to repair- decide to put that money towards a new computer.

Day 16- Receive my new Mac laptop (ordered online by my husband because I, of course, have no way of accessing the internet now). My Mac won't connect to the internet via ethernet. The wireless works no problem, but no ethernet. Damn. Is it my new computer, or this router?

Day 17 - Bring my new computer to work, it connects to the internet just fine via ethernet. Bring my work laptop home (PC) and it connects via ethernet, but not via wireless, Call AT&T tech support. Am treated like an idiot by Jed, who sounds like "Peggy" from the Discover commercial.... Work PC connects via wireless, but can't do anything on internet because I don't have permission for my computer to use wireless networks. Finally get the mac to connect to the internet via ethernet. Hang up the phone with Jed and 20 minutes later, the Mac can't connect via ethernet again.

Day 18 - Have the work IT people enable my work laptop to use wireless networks. Initially, they are very pissy about this, but when I point out that I'm not going to travel for work with a computer that can't use wireless networks, they do the job and enable the settings at my request. Bring work laptop home- still won't connect to internet via wireless (although it connects to the wireless network at the local coffee shop). Mac still won't connect to internet via ethernet. Call AT&T and get someone that knows Macs (finally!). I am given new settings to type in and everything appears to work by the time I hang up. Never addressed the problem with the PC.

Day 17 - Receive bill for internet service (with my apartment number on it!), that states my service start date is one week before I even received the router. Call AT&T billing. Daniella is initially resistant to my complaint, but warms up and gives me a credit for that week that I didn't have the router after I offer to scan and email the slip from UPS saying when I picked up the package (I did think ahead to ask for one!). I am a bit disgruntled to find out that my internet promotion rate won't kick in for 1-3 billing cycles, something I was never informed of!

Day 18- Mac can't connect to internet via ethernet again. This means that I can't watch the Red Sox-Yankee game online. Call AT&T tech support again. I get Andrea. Andrea stays on the line with me for 45 minutes trying to trouble shoot my problems. She is a bit annoyed that I don't have the PC home with me so she can check that issue, but she gets over it quickly. After 45 minutes, Andrea concludes that I need a new router. She orders one for me and nicely double checks that the address contains my apartment number so that I will get the new router in a timely manner.

Day 20- Receive the new router. Can't get the Mac to connect at all. Call AT&T tech support and get John, who initially treats me like an idiot. After 15 minutes, John realizes that the issue is that my passwords don't match- the new router isn't configured to use MY passwords yet, but my account is already set up, so I can't use the passwords that came with the router. John resets the passwords and I breeze through the set-up just in time to watch my first playoff hockey game that night!

Day 30 - Get my second bill from AT&T charging me for the new router, even though I had already mailed the old one back to them. Call AT&T billing and spend 30 minutes going up levels of management until they finally waive the fee for the second router because I can give them the tracking number of the one I mailed back to them.

Day 31- Lose internet connection intermittently throughout a playoff hockey game. After game is over, I call AT&T tech support. They have no explanation, so they transfer me to the billing office, where I get absolutely no where. Have now written a letter to AT&T with my complaints as well as contacted the better business bureau. I'm sorry, but if I'm paying for a service and not receiving that service, then I should get a refund for the service I didn't receive!



and so the saga continues.....

Proof of residence

I've lived outside New England before. In fact, I lived outside of NE for 10 years. Never have I encountered a utility situation quite like that here in MS. However, my Dad informs me that the system here is common in several parts of the US. Here in MS, you can not just pick up the phone, call the utility company and have your utilities turned on. Oh no. Here, they want you to show up in person with a government-issued photo ID, a check for a deposit AND proof of residence. This last requirement is what caused me all sorts of headaches. I knew about the requirement for proof of residence prior to moving down. My landlord had told me that she expected me to have the utilities transferred to my name on or before the day I moved in. How I was supposed to do this before, I'm not sure. In any case, we had 2 phone conversations and an email about the need for her to provide me with a signed copy of the lease so that I could take care of this. I suggested that she either scan and email the lease BEFORE I moved (when I had access to a printer) or leave a signed copy of the lease in the apartment (I knew prior to the move that she was having someone else meet me with the key). No copy of the lease was left in the apartment. Therefore, I called her and told her that because she didn't hold up her end of the bargain (getting me a copy of the signed lease), the utilities would have to stay in her name until she provided me with a copy of the lease AND I could get sufficient time off of work to go to the utility companies and take care of it. She then responded by emailing me a copy of the lease. This did me precisely no good because my printer was on a moving truck and wasn't scheduled to be delivered till the following week. So I called her again asking what she though I could do with an emailed copy of a lease and no way to print it. She then arranged for "friends" at the utility company to overlook the proof of residence requirement. So I got my utilities turned on. However, without a copy of the lease, I couldn't get internet service, couldn't transfer my plates to MS plates or obtain a MS drivers license. Oh, and I couldn't even rent a PO Box without proof of residence either. Needless to say, my first day in MS had me in tears of anger and frustration more than once.

Landlord

Ah, yes, my landlord. First off, I pretty much decided to rent this apartment because it was the only apartment the relocation expert found that would take Darwin. Then I got down here and discovered that the relocation expert is my landlord's sister. I would have no problem with the relocation expert throwing business to her sister if my landlord wasn't such a fruitcake. Seriously. First, how could she not know that my apartment wasn't ready? Either she's a space cadet or a really poor businesswoman. Second, when I moved into the apartment, the heat did not work because the fan did not work. I called my landlord each and every day asking when it would be fixed. After 2 weeks of this, I sent her an email saying I wasn't paying rent until she had the heat fixed. I then received a pissy email about how she couldn't let anyone into my apartment to fix the heat because of my dog (before signing the lease, I stressed that I was not going to be responsible for my dog biting someone if they entered the apartment without me being there). So I informed her (by voicemail and email) that I had meetings Monday afternoon, but could rearrange my work schedule the rest of the week to accommodate a repairman IF I had 2 days notice. She then left me a voice mail saying she'd schedule the repair for Monday morning. I then stressed (voicemail and email again), that I had to leave my apartment by 12:45 to attend my meetings and that I would like to know what time the repairman was coming. I repeated the voicemail/email combo again on Saturday, Sunday and Monday morning. I actually woke her up Monday morning because I called at 7:30AM. She still had no idea what time the repairman was coming as he hadn't even confirmed that he was coming with her. I informed her that I was going to work and that she should call me when she knew what time the repairman was arriving. I stressed once again that I had meetings that I HAD to attend that afternoon. Therefore, I was a little irate when she called me at 12:30 and said the repairman would be there in 10 minutes. Ummm....he could be there, but I couldn't meet him. She actually demanded that I cancel my meetings! However, when I informed her that if I canceled my meetings, I'd better cancel my lease because there was no reason for me to stay in MS without a job, she miraculously rescheduled the repairman to after my meetings. At this point, I was getting the definite impression that the only way to get through to this woman is by threatening to withhold rent or cancel the lease. While my heating was being repaired, the repairman noticed that I did not have any sort of filter on the air intake. He told my landlord, who decided that she'd drop one off. Luckily she called me first to make sure that Darwin was confined. Confined? He isn't a puppy and his house manners have been impeccable since he was 10 weeks old. She was shocked that I let my dog "roam free" in my absence. Seriously? what does she think he does in the apartment? In any case, she was then pissy because I told her to leave the filter in the door. What part of the "you will not enter the apartment unless I am present" does she not understand?

Oh, and the kicker to all this? Crazy landlord lady wanted me to talk DH into using HER as our real estate agent when we bought a home. Yeah, like that would ever happen. All I have to say is that I'm warning all new hires here away from renting from this crazy lady. And the relocation expert? Yeah, I've been refusing her calls because I don't think I could say anything nice.

Move to MS

I hadn't mentioned it on my blog, but since last September, I've been working on obtaining a job as a government scientist. This job is truly my dream job- no teaching, about 2 months of grant writing per year and the rest of the time in the lab. Oh- and I only have to work on a particular project for 3-5 years. No studying a random protein on a random virus for the rest of my career. Only downside is that the job is in MS.

2 days after my grandfather's funeral, I set out for MS with my Great Dane, Darwin. 90% of the items in the Jeep were for Darwin- I had a single suitcase and a backpack with my electronics. We made it to the half-way point in VA without any issues. The following day, we took longer rest stops - mostly because Darwin insisted on spending an hour rolling in the grass in the beautiful warm TN sunshine. Can't say I blame him, 70F felt very nice considering it was 20F when we set out the previous day! After we left the TN rest stop, I got a call from my landlord. My apartment was not going to be available to me upon my arrival in MS (despite the fact the landlord had already cashed my rent check AND had an additional week to get the apartment ready as I moved a week later than initially planned due to my grandfather's death). However, the landlord offered to put me up in a corporate apartment until my apartment was ready. OK. Not happy about this as I wanted to get Darwin settled in my new apartment before I started work, but what can I do? I show up at the corporate apartment at 10PM- only to discover that the previous tenant smoked menthols. I have always had a severe asthmatic reaction to menthols- there is no way I can stay in this apartment even for a single night! Of course, I can't get ahold of the landlord, so I left a pissy message and frantically called my husband. DH located a pet friendly motel for me, so I called and verified that they had a room. I was expecting some sort of sleazy place, but the motel was actually nicer than the more expensive hotel we'd stayed at the previous night. Darwin especially enjoyed the king-sized bed.


The next day, I got a call from the landlord saying that she is very sensitive to cigarette smoke and never had a problem with the corporate apartment. I responded that sensitivities come in different strengths- and mine was likely greater than hers as I'd been reacting for 30+ years. The landlord then informed me that she'd inspected the apartment and it was ready for me to move in. She couldn't meet me with the key as she had a meeting, but she had a friend bring the key over. I went to the apartment and was appalled at how filthy it was. There was a layer of plaster dust all the way up the hall (I don't think that even a token attempt was made to clean it), the kitchen counters (white) were covered in stains and I don't even want to think about how nasty the bathroom and oven were. Needless to say $400 in cleaning supplies (including 2 boxes of disposable gloves), and the apartment is at least clean....

Quick Update

Since my last post, my beloved Grandpa has passed away, I've moved "down South" and I've started working as a government scientist. I have much to write about and I promise I'll post more soon. RIP Grandpa.

Been bothering me for a while....

So I'm a season ticket holder for an NHL team and have been for 2 years. In that two years, I've seen multiple airlines sponsor the starting lineup announcements. Didn't bother me in the slightest when Southwest or Jet Blue sponsored them last season. However, Air Tran has been sponsoring them this season and it really, really irks me. Why? Air Tran is NOT friendly to people traveling with hockey gear. In fact, they were downright hostile. The last time DH and I flew to a hockey tournament (he is a goalie) we unfortunately flew Air Tran. DH has been traveling with goalie equipment since he was in grade school, so he has a lot of experience toting his equipment around. He uses 2 hockey bags (essentially very large duffel bags) so that his equipment does not exceed the weight limits. Yes, the dimensions of the bags technically exceed the accepted dimensions- for a hard case. However, Air Tran (just like Southwest, Delta, and USAir), states that if the bag is soft-side, the measurements are taken via compressing the bag. As each bag is less than half-full, not a problem. Flying Air Tran to the tournament was no problem. We had to pay extra for his sticks, but that is generally the case (they exceed dimensions) unless we fly first class or Air Canada (hockey equipment flies free on Air Canada!). On the way home, however, the Air Tran officials would not follow their stated policy of measuring the bags at their compressed measurement. When we complained to the manager we were told, well, if you persist in complaining, I will charge you 2x the fee because you didn't get charged flying here. Manager then refused to give me a statement of his measurements of the bag. He even refused to give me a copy of the exact baggage policy they use (since they weren't following the one published on the web). Apparently, they can randomly decide that something is too big and they don't even have to furnish you with their measurements. Two written complaints to Air Tran were ignored until I got the better business bureau involved. Even then, all they would give me was an Air Tran credit for $30 (fee was $100). Like we were ever going to fly that airline again! I donated the credit and all of our airline miles to Fisher House Foundation (provides flights for family members of soldiers wounded in action). Even then, I felt guilty that I was condemning some poor worried family member to having to deal with Air Tran!

Worst HR Rep Ever

Last October, I got contacted by the worst HR rep ever. First, he called and left a message- without referencing a job or a job number. When I called him back, I found out he was calling about a job application that I had filled out back in January- 10 months prior! He was quite annoyed that I didn't even recall his company nevermind what the position entailed. Most of the time when I get called by an HR rep months after applying to a position, they tell me that they've emailed the job description to me to refresh my memory and to return their call after I've looked it over. To appease him, I requested that he email me the job description and that I would call him back when I had looked over the details. I then call the guy back and he basically tells me that he is contacting me because they still haven't filled the position. He then implies that I am his last choice but HIS boss said that he wanted to interview me. Can we say unprofessional? He then tried to set up a phone interview with me the following evening at 7:30PM. He was surprised when I stated that the time was not convenient for me as I had a prior commitment (I had plans to attend a sporting event). He then told me that "you know, someone in your position can't pick and choose." I wasn't picking and choosing- he proposed a time that didn't work for me. For all he knew, I had scheduled another interview at that time or was working the late shift somewhere. So I simply reiterated that I had a prior commitment and asked for the next available interview opening. He told me that he'd have to get back to me. He then called me back at 7:45AM on a Saturday morning to schedule an interview. I was actually out walking the dog and returned the call when I returned. He then stated that if I wanted a job at his company, I would have to get used to getting up earlier (ummm....I can't tell you the number of times in grad school I started an experiment at 4AM in order to time it so that shared equipment would be available). I didn't reply to that statement...just let a long drawn out silence develop. He then responded "Well..." I replied that I was returning his call, why did he call me? He then responded that he called me to schedule an interview, but had changed his mind as he didn't think I'd be a good fit for his company. At this point, I was wondering what sort of reputable company can't fill a position in 10 months and works these sort of crazy hours. So I just replied I'm sorry he felt that way and wished him a enjoyable weekend. I then dismissed the entire incident from my mind until today. Yes, today, a Sunday, when I received a "LinkedIn" request from him. Yeah, because it's a good idea to network with someone who has implied that you are lazy and not worth employing. Oh, and I checked, the position I applied for- it is still open.

Not sure what to think

So I messed up. I forgot to mail HH's birthday card until the day of her birthday. I truly meant to call her and wish her happy birthday (she may be psychotic and mean, but she is my grandmother). However, right as we finished dinner, we had an emergency call from the neighbors. My neighbor has been battling cancer for 22 years. She's gone into remission a few times, but it always comes back. In October, she had brain surgery to remove a tumor. Several months of therapy later, she is still experiencing seizure-like symptoms. After a long day at the hospital, she fell trying to get up the stairs to her house (therapists WANT her doing stairs, hence no wheel chair ramp). Her wheel chair is impossibly heavy, so the neighbors called for help carrying it and her up the stairs as neighbor's husband and daughter couldn't quite manage it. DH and Dad were both out, so that left me. I can lift about 40lbs when walking up stairs. Obvious solution is to carry neighbor up separately from her chair, but she is so exhausted that she can't assist and we were afraid of dropping her without the support of the wheelchair. So I proposed that the neighbor's daughter and I take the bottom of the chair while the husband took the top. Working together this way, we got my neighbor and her chair up the stairs and into her house. In all this excitement, I forgot all about HH's birthday until after 9PM. I called HH at 10 the next morning, got her machine and apologized profusely and wished her a happy birthday. Tried 2x more to get ahold of her, but kept getting the machine. Dad gets home from his weekly visit today, and tells me that she was snippy with him because I forgot to call on her birthday because the neighbors are clearly more important to me. There is a grain of truth to that statement, which is probably why it hurts, but at the same time, I owned up to what I did wrong and apologized. What more can I do? Tell the neighbor, "Would you mind waiting out in the cold for 10 minutes while I call my grandmother and wish her happy birthday?"